The Road Goes Ever, Ever On

On a sunny Friday in late October, I set out on part two of my Grand Experiment. The first time I embarked on this journey, was a month earlier, I had made the brash, bold (some might say “idiotic”) decision to try SUV RVing. I figured why not? Everything is on Zoom; I can Zoom from anywhere. So off I went in my 2017 Jeep Cherokee, just Rubi and me and the open road before us.

It was definitely a learning experience, but Rubi and I had a blast. There was only one concern: Where on earth would Wham! fit? I knew I’d be taking my 9-year-old cat on phase 2 of the journey, but the Jeep was cramped, to say the least.

Serendipitously, Mark Arnest was needing to find a new home for his mother’s 2000 Toyota Sienna minivan. I guess you could say it was a match made in heaven—well, maybe more like a match made in Colorado Springs, but you get the point!

After I returned home from the inaugural Car Camino, I got the van and promptly began researching how best to convert it into a RV, of sorts. As before, people pitched in and helped with the efforts and soon my house looked like an Amazon distribution center with boxes containing everything from a cot to a traveling kitty litter box.

It is so much roomier than the Cherokee!

Of course, there was that little issue of Wham! who maybe hadn’t gotten the memo that Adventures,

and Buffoonery soon awaited him on the open road. I helpfully bought him the book, Adventure Cats! Living Nine Lives to the Fullest! But, although he appeared interested, I don’t think he did more than leaf through the pages.

At any rate, I had Big Plans to get Wham! gradually accustomed to Van Life. I imagined I would first get him stoned on grade A cat nip, then take him for slow drives around the neighborhood, while I spoke reassuringly to him. In reality, his first trip was to the mobile Human Society clinic where he got his annual vaccines and had a microchip shot into his neck.

Perhaps that wasn’t the best way to get him acclimated. We did go for a few short drives around the neighborhood, but- and again let me point out, he didn’t read the book—he clearly wasn’t ready for the Grand Adventure to begin. He had adjusted well to wearing his harness, however, so I took that for a good sign.

Not sure if Wham! made it to this chapter

On the morning we set out, I lodged his soft-side pet crate right behind the driver’s seat where I could reach back and pet him through the mesh zippered door. It’s a great crate, and actually was the one Rubi travelled from Manor, TX to her new home in Colorado Springs, just 18 months earlier. Rubi had used it as a lounging pad until she outgrew it, whereupon Wham! took it over for himself. So, he was familiar with the crate and comfortable in it. On dry land, that is.

On the sea of four-lane freeways, Wham! was not as pleased. This despite the fact that I put in three brand new catnip toys and sprinkled some of the wacky weed liberally on the floor of the crate.

For the first three hours, he meowed constantly and piteously. Rubi, in her designated shotgun seat next to me, would occasionally glance balefully at me as if to say, “Did we really have to bring him along?”

Yes, we did. Wham!’s favorite place is on my lap or by my side and I decided he needed to be a part of the family fun. I was sure he would get used to the swaying of the car which did not, unfortunately, work the same magic it did on my son, Sam, when he was a colicky baby.

Shortly before our first scheduled stop in Colby, KS (the Oasis of the Plains, its sign proudly declares) I heard a whirring sound and glanced in my rear-view mirror to see that Wham! had pulled apart the zipper on the top of the crate and was emerging looking not unlike the first alien birth in that movie. Driving as I was, down I-70, I was a bit concerned, but Wham! busied himself exploring the back of the van, all the while meowing his protests loudly.

In just a few minutes I had pulled into the Travel Center in Colby, which featured a small, fenced-in dog park. Before exiting the van, I clambered into the back, fetched Wham! and put him back in his crate, pulling the top zippers together at the edge of the line, rather than in the center. In the 30 minutes or so it took Rubi to do her business, me to fuel up and use the people restroom, and get back on the road, Wham! seemed to have settled down. After a few initials meows as we pulled back onto the freeway, he was quiet the rest of the trip.

Finally, we arrived in Lawrence, KS where we would spend our first few nights with my sister, Lori, in her apartment. I dropped Rubi off at my niece’s home, where there was a large back yard and several other animals to play with.

Wham! stayed in the guest bedroom and was extremely happy to cuddle with me every night. But all good things must end, and soon, on Monday morning, we picked up Rubi and hit the open road again.

Clearly Wham! had forgotten this nightmare and the meowing began again. This time, however, I had the crate in the very back of the van (due to the fact that I had wedged it so securely behind my driver’s seat that poor Wham! was tilted and tugged out when I arrived at my sister’s; I don’t think that helped matters any.)

Wham! on pit stop.

Within an hour after we departed Lawrence, I once again heard the ripping of the top zipper and Wham! proved true to the sequel, Aliens. This time he made his way up front and I pulled off the freeway in an effort to get him settled in again. I noticed that he didn’t actually pull apart the seam where the two zipper ends met; he made his own opening.

After trying to get him back in the crate and driving slowly around, only for him to escape once more, I resorted to a MacGyver solution: I attached his bungee-like leash onto his harness and hooked it in the back of the cot. There. Now he could just reach in between the two front seats but couldn’t come up front where he might be a dangerous distraction. 

And so, thus outfitted, we sailed away.

He really seemed to become acclimated to the driving, and would sometimes lie on the cot, or on top of his (useless) crate, but most of the time, he would sit between the seats, where I could reach down and
pet him every once in a while.

Thus, began Travels with Rubi and Wham! The road goes ever, ever on, as Bilbo said.

 

Rubi and Wham! keeping an eye on me
during fueling break. Can you see Wham!?